Health esteem: Why it’s good to celebrate the wins in your journey to better health

January is a time when many around you might be setting lofty fitness goals, embarking on a 180-degree turn for their nutrition, or are setting other intentions and timelines that are barely achievable.

The majority of individuals —80%— who set a New Year’s resolution abandon them by February. Why? This is likely because the goals they set were far too aggressive and potentially mired in personal shame. How we talk to ourselves matters. If you’ve set an unachievable goal and don’t encourage yourself to meet small milestones, that is a one-two punch to knock your resolution to the ground.

Instead of making major New Year’s resolutions this year, consider focusing on health esteem.

We’ll provide some tips on how to do this to achieve your mental health goals, but even if your goals aren’t related to mental health, your mental well-being will be better off if you practice health esteem.

What is health esteem?

Health esteem is the idea of celebrating who you are and embracing positive self-esteem related to health and fitness while championing the version of yourself you want to work on becoming.

Unlike other health, diet and fitness fads, health esteem encourages individuals to focus on themselves and their goals rather than comparing themselves to the progress or health journeys of others.

How do you practice health esteem?

Set small milestones. For instance, if you set a goal to go to the gym six days a week when you currently haven’t worked out in months, you’re setting yourself up for an unhappy and possibly unattainable fitness journey. You can practice health esteem by being grateful for having enough health and mobility to work out. You can then set a small goal, such as wanting to start by working out for 30 minutes three times a week, and set a deadline to increase that goal.

Here's how that can look for mental health: “I’ve been feeling really down for a long time and having a really negative mindset. I went to therapy a few times years ago. I’m going to start by scheduling one or two appointments with a therapist. If we don’t click after a few appointments, I’m going to find another therapist and hold myself to finding a therapist I connect with.”

Speak positively to yourself. Your brain has the power to effect real change. In fact, studies confirm that self-talk can improve cognitive performance and empower you to work toward your goals. Another benefit of speaking positively about yourself is that you can overwrite any internalized negative ideas about yourself. If you speak positively about yourself, you’re much more likely to feel encouraged to keep going and enjoy the progress you’re making.

Here's how positive self-talk can sound related to mental health: “I have been feeling anxious lately about my work, but I know that I’m capable. I can ask my colleagues for constructive feedback, but I will also be proud of the fact that I’m paying attention to what triggers my anxiety. Then, I’ll make a plan to address those triggers.”

Make a not-to-do list. If you’re not sure where to start on your quest to better mental health and improved overall well-being, you can start with what you know you don’t want, such as the actions and scenarios that don’t serve you. You can reflect introspectively and consider the pitfalls that you may have fallen in previously when trying to reach your goals. Also, consider scenarios outside of your own actions. Are you feeling stressed and spread too thin? Identify a commitment you can take off your calendar or a task can you delegate. Then, add that task or commitment to your not-to-do list so you know not to commit to it in the future.

Here's what a don’t-do list can look like as you focus on reaching your mental health goals: “I have been feeling a lot of hopelessness. When something negative happens, like I don’t hit a goal I set for myself, I’ve been catastrophizing the situation and completely giving up. Instead of thinking about the worst outcome and giving up, I’m going to focus on finding one positive thing I’ve done and one way to get back on track to reach my goal.”